Click here to read: Chapter 1.1
Well, I finally finished the first 2 pages of Chapter 1. This was a hard one. It was my first section, and when writing it I completely felt like that little girl sitting in class. I was so confused as to why they were laughing at me. I had to have a few moments after writing this to breathe and bring myself back to the present. Those who have or had depression, and similar experiences can probably relate with this part. I am not angry at the the teacher, there’s no need to be. I am not angry at those who bullied me, they didn’t know any better – at least that’s what I tell myself. I think this was hard to write because I am picturing a young child, unbroken, innocent, and happy. I know what her life is going to be like, and I feel sad for her. I want to tell her it’s going to be okay. You will get through it. I picture my daughter sitting in that desk. It hurts to have that image in my mind knowing whats coming up ahead.
I never thought I was better than them. However, that’s how it all started. That one comment. You will see as the story unfolds how that snowballed to bigger things. I was prissy, I thought I knew more, I was a brown noser, etc. I lost count of the spit balls in my hair, ruined property I tossed, and the number of times I faked sick to miss school. I also lost count of the number of times I grabbed a handful of my parents’ heart medication and just stood with it in my hand crying. Too many memories are coming back, so I am going to stop there. All I will say in closing, is I am glad I am still here. My life is great now, not always easy, but it is great.
Thanks for reading,
Anne West
mydailysurvival 